“Facebook – Two clicks away from the end of innocence”

WARNING:

This post is extremely explicit and contains adult language and is written for 18+.
If you are under 18 or feel you may be offended then DO NOT read it.

This was a very hard post to write, but I feel very strongly about this issue, and therefore my obligation to pass this information on. Similarly, if you know anyone with kids on Facebook, please share this article with them.

I am an avid user of Facebook personally and for my business, and this article is not anti-Facebook as such, it is about minors on Facebook, and the often inappropriate language and discussions they encounter. 

Facebook – It’s free and it’s safe….isn’t it?

Facebook is an online community where you join for free and set up a profile page with information about yourself. You can then locate and connect with other people who have joined Facebook to be part of your ‘virtual’ social network – making them ‘friends’. Facebook has 700 million users, with one billion predicted before 2013. Facebook say you have to be at least 13 years old to have a Facebook account.

According to the Facebook Security Centre page,

“Just like adults, teens use Facebook to connect with friends—through chat, personal messages and sharing photos, videos, links and other kinds of information. They use Facebook to announce achievements, wish each other a happy birthday and plan social events – like going to a movie or a friend’s house.”

Sounds great, doesn’t it?

Well, in reality, it isn’t.

Here are some ‘chat and personal messages’ taken live from Facebook this week.

I have obscured some of the worst words to make this post less offensive, but on Facebook all these words are fully spelled, and not censored.

Sample Exchange 1

Boy 16                   “Ah who are you anyways?”

Girl 15                    “That girl you tried to rape a few months back”

Boy 16                   “I never raped anyone, get your story right bitch. You were that drunk slut, having sex with everything that moved…”

Girl 15                    “I said you tried too, and just cause I love cock! Wouldn’t even want you choad* up me anyway”

Boy 16                   “Good I don’t want aids.. Even if I did, you would still have room for another 4 cocks, you dirty big hole slut”

(* choad is new slang for penis, or the area between the penis and anus)

Sample Exchange 2

Boy 16                   “Just f#ck off. It will be funny when you realize how of a bitch you actually are, because by then you will have no friends at all. Pull ya f#cking head in seriously!! Stupid bitch..

Girl 15                    “whatever…. this has gone way to far now.. You abusing me for no reason is really getting to me! I do f#cking nothing wrong! I’m sick of top toeing around you because I’m scared what you’ll say but f#ck ya !

Other Sample Comments

?Boy 16                   “Grow some balls c#nt” Nan that’s my girlfriend”

Boy 15                   “I smoke cones out of your mums vagina!”

Boy 15                   “Girlsname best root. Knows how to make your night, takes it up the ass. Also knows how to use her hands. 10/10.”

Boy 15                   “Boysname takes whatever he can get such a fleece bag. He even got caught wanking over his mum in the shower.”

Boy 16                   “Boysname gave one to Girlsname up the ass in the boys toilets at school. He split her ass cheeks 4 inch apart from each other. But he said it was worth the ride, even though it was smothered in blood and sh!t.”

Girl 12                              “You make my p#ssy and panties wet”

I told you it was bad, didn’t I?

In preparation for this article I logged on to the Facebook website, and in less than 5 minutes came across these posts, comments and exchanges above, not by searching for them but by just clicking on a profile of a 14 year old girl and then through to some random profiles of her 900 ‘friends’.

I could easily copy and paste these posts to reveal the full names, photos and even mobile phone numbers of some of those involved, in fact anyone could, because once you write on Facebook it no longer just belongs to you. It is there forever, even if you delete it, it is there somewhere.

Now, to be clear, it is not Facebook that has made the children that wrote these comments as morally devoid as they seem to us. I am sure that in real life, within their peer groups, they are every bit as unpleasant as they present themselves to be on Facebook.

The real issue is that my child and your child, who we hope are never going to post comments like this, or even think this way, are just two clicks away from reading this type of exchange.

And what exactly does a 13 or 14 year old child think when they read these words and try to understand the extremely adult concepts described, especially when it appears as a seemingly acceptable form of banter between their peers, and their ‘friends’?

Facebook – Devaluing Friendship

Traditionally, the word “friend” means a person whom one knows and with whom one has a bond of mutual affection. It also implies a certain level of trust.

In the Facebook world, you are encouraged to connect with your other real world friends that have joined, and further encouraged to make new ‘friends’, who might be total strangers, or ‘friends’ of ‘friends’.

Furthermore, Facebook actively recommends potential ‘friends’ to you, based on the fact that they know someone you know.

So in this new virtual world, a ‘friend’ is not necessarily a friend at all. They might even be the exact opposite.

On Facebook, when a teenager has 500, 600, 700, 800, 900 or even 1000 friends, the word ‘friend’ is no longer the correct terminology.

Many teenagers see it as a popularity contest, amassing as many ‘friends’ as they can. When I ask “Tell me three things about this friend?” there are no answers, because they do not know them. I questioned teenagers, “How often do you see something inappropriate?” they all answered “Every day”.

They may not be the one writing the inappropriate comments; it could just be a friend of a friend, which they have connected with. Most parents know their children’s friends from school, sports activities and family friends. What you can never know is who your children’s Facebook ‘friends of friends’ are, especially when they can run into the thousands.

Your child may be completely innocent and use Facebook appropriately, but they could be one click away from accepting a friendship from someone who you would never want your child to associate with, or someone you would not welcome in to your home.

Facebook states,

The only people who can see what teens post are their Facebook friends, friends of friends, and networks (like the school they attend). We maintain added protections and security settings for teens (age 13-17) that ensure their profiles and posts don’t show up in public search results. Similarly, if teens share their location through Places, only their Facebook friends can see it.”

And this would be great, if it referred to the true meaning of the word friend.

But in the Facebook world, a ‘friend’ can mean practically anyone, which makes a joke of their “Relax, it’s only friends and friends of friends who can see teenagers posts…” attitude.

Facebook – it can’t hurt, can it?

Facebook is a totally unsuitable environment for most minors and out of the technical grasp of many parents. Its proliferation and appeal to the young is desensitising our children by exposing them to extreme sexual words and concepts far too early.

Ask yourself – would you want to show your teenager the Facebook posts at the start of this article? Why not?

These are teenagers, not adults. As adults we can choose to read what we want and pretty much do what we want. We also have a greater awareness of the sad, dark and alternative side of life, but our experience and emotional maturity enables us to (hopefully) filter out that which we find offensive or confronting.

Young minds are not at this stage, and more dangerously they are at a crucial developmental stage mentally, which will shape their future adult personalities.

These are children growing into teenagers growing into adulthood. Does exposure to this help our children grow into happy, kind, respectful and loving adults? Does it give them a balanced view of the world, of human nature, of friendships? Or does it damage them in some way?

Teenagers are using Facebook in the classroom on their mobile phones. Teenagers are setting up Facebook pages bragging about who they have had sex with in their town. Teenagers have their mobile numbers on their profile page and some profile photos are extremely provocative and some are just rude and offensive.

With the teenagers I work with and mentor, I see first hand the damage it is causing to our children, with many using Facebook up to four hours plus a day. Some of their behavioural issues are aggravated or being fuelled by Facebook and what they read on there.

I do understand that across the Internet, there is a variety of uncensored material, but Facebook is the biggest social media our children are using today and there is an implied responsibility for them to provide age appropriate regulation or moderation of the virtual environment.

And all the time they are selling the parents on how great and warm and fuzzy it all is.

It needs to be changed; Facebook, parents and schools need to change this now!

Facebook – who’s in charge of it?

Parents, we need to be catching up to our teenagers and taking active responsibility for them. It is our ‘duty of care’.

If you have a child under 12 with a Facebook account you should cancel it.

If you have a child 13 or older and are happy for them to have a Facebook account, be aware of who their friends are, talk to them and help guide them through all the nasty stuff out there.

Communicate with your teenager; insist on technology free time at home and make sure they truly understand what a real friend is.

Schools, why does a teenager need a mobile phone in their lesson? Make it school policy that mobiles stay in lockers’ all day. Yes! Even at break time. Teen’s Facebook each other when they are in the same room and sitting next to one another. These teenagers are losing or not fully developing inter-personal relationship skills, their social skills and their respect; Facebook is their online world.

Facebook needs to pull its head out of the sand and say, “Yes we have a problem”

Facebook should change their system, and implement (at least) two levels of relationships with people. One called ‘Friends’, – which would specifically be the people who are your real friends, and another call ‘Connections’, – who are all the other people you may or may not want to know. This would restore the definition of friendship, and allow everyone to discern between the two groups, both in their interactions and in their minds.

Facebook need to provide an automatic filter to block out or obscure obscene words in real time on the pages. The filter should also be activated automatically for all accounts belonging to minors. I am sure the technology for this already exists.

Facebook needs to close down all profiles who belong to known underage users and shut down all current profiles with extreme offensive language.

Facebook needs to find a system to verify a child’s real age. I acknowledge that this is no easy task, but they must try.

Facebook – they care about our kids, don’t they?

You would think with all the lip service paid to security and safety by Facebook on their site, that once I had brought these comments to their attention that someone would be mortified, take some action, remove the posts, or something.

Facebook says,

A new feature, social reporting, lets people report offensive material to Facebook at the same time as they alert someone in their community (like a friend, parent or teacher) who may help them address the issue more directly. We hope that features like this will help people get to the root of the problem quickly. As we do with all of our features, we’ll continue to refine social reporting over time to make sure it continues to be an effective safety tool.”

I tried their social reporting, to no avail. I have tried to contact them multiple times through every means possible, the links on each offending page, direct email, Facebook Safety Centre, blocking and reporting profiles, yet I have not had a single response, not a peep. And I am not even sure if they have received the messages I have left for them.

According to Nicky Jackson Colaco, Facebook’s Safety Policy Manager, “There are a ton of people who work on safety at Facebook..”, yet I cannot seem to get a response from a single one of them. Needless to say, these posts as quoted are still on Facebook.

Facebook can, and do, just turn around and say it’s up to the parents to be responsible for what their children do, but some teenagers do not have the support or come from a family who are tech savvy. In fact, Facebook’s own security site tells parents that their children will most likely know more about Facebook than them, and they should ask the children for guidance!

Facebook acknowledges that you, the parent, are unlikely to know much about how it all works, but assures you it is a good environment for your child to spend time. In fact, they are talking about opening it up to all ages, with no minimum age.

I found a Facebook page titled “Facebook’s Commitment to Child Safety Online”, which assures us in some blurb that ‘they are just going to keep on doing a great job!’.

Posted below the blurb were a number of comments posted by Facebook users, and I have copied these below.

I can give you a list of sites that are openly minors. They make no effort to hide it – some as young as 7 and you won’t take them down. You’ve written a nice article [Facebook] but, quite simply, we don’t believe you. May 26 at 1:44pm.

Extremely angry that you have allowed the developer and application ARE YOU SEXY/you are sexy access not only to my 13 year olds fb page but that it continues to email me although I’ve marked it both as spam and requested that it be deleted and have failed.  Tuesday at 10:15am.

SOMEONE NEED TO CHECK THE PERSON WHO MADE THIS PAGE HE’S TAKING CHILDRENS PICS OFF THE PARENTS PAGES AND MAKING FAKE PAGES OF THE CHILDREN SAYING HOW HE WANTS TO RAPE THEM AND DO THINGS TO THE CHILDREN AND SENDING THREAT MESSAGES TO PEOPLE!!!! PLEASE FACEBOOK DO SOMETING ABOUT THIS ISSUE WITH THE OWNER OF THIS PAGE TITLED XXXXXXXXXXX !!!!!!

I have learned that my 9 yr old grandson has a fb page, I want to disable his account but don’t have password. I’m not sure how it was set up but I have tried reporting the page, I am concerned because Interested in was marked men..I know …there are a lot of freaks out there and I don’t want my little 9 yr old grandson attracting that attention. Don’t you have to be 13 yrs old? Who can I send his information to without spreading his name in the open for all to see? May 29 at 8:51pm.

Our children need guidance, support, morals and respect. They need shielding from the adult side of life until they are adults, which is pretty much what parents have been doing for generations. This is made more difficult in the case of Facebook as the children we are trying to protect are usually far more savvy in the technolgy than their parents, and it is almost impossible for a non-tecnical parent to get to grips with the complexities of the security and privacy settings for social networking.

Facebook, parents, schools and government must work together to maintain this shield.

Facebook will not do it on their own. After all, why would they? It’s all good as far as they’re concerned.


Facebook Links

Facebook in the News

http://www.news.com.au/breaking-news/m-facebook-users-are-under-13/story-e6frfku0-1226053702263

http://www.heraldsun.com.au/news/more-news/turn-on-log-in-and-stress-out-kids/story-fn7x8me2-1226069715205

http://www.heraldsun.com.au/news/more-news/campaigners-want-shocking-facebook-pages-shut-down/story-fn7x8me2-1226067478599

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Nathalie Brown

Child Behaviour Consultant at Easy Peasy Kids
Child Behaviourist and researcher. Creator of "Less tantrums. More smiles". I look at the bigger picture and think outside the box when working with children and their behaviour. Their world is different. As adults we sometimes forget this. Happiness Creator in my spare time. Eater of chocolate and cake.

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Comments

  1. Oh Nathalie! I was about to go to sleep & thought I might read ur post. I’m shocked! Stunned! Speechless!
    As I lie in bed hugging 2yr old. I’m terrified of what the future holds for her. I sometimes wish life was like that movie from the 80’s. Where I was “Uncle Buck” pulled a massive fake gun & scared the hell of the teens. But this us real life. That is scarier… For starters I will forward this to all my friends & pray for a better future for our kids.

  2. A great read and so well written. A confronting reality of our current world of social media. As I use Facebook regulary for personal and business use master 4 already understands the concept of Facebook. My job now is to protect and educate my boys. Thank you.

  3. Oh Nathalie! I applaud you for having the guts to share this. Yes, I agree this is all our problem to address. As parents of teens, we can stand for our kids- but the many kids that don’t have any role modeling- surely we as a community must be responsible for them to. As a nation we are walking a thin tightrope here, on one hand our Federal Education guidelines outline that every teen should have access to education in a safe, non abusive, non derogatory manner- and well FB of this kind totally eradicates this possibility for teens involved. A gift of a teenage life is what is deserved for the young of Australia, what type of gift is this? Education Dept, schools, FB, parents much needs to be done. Again Nathalie- standing firmly with you on this
    one. Thanks for your essential blog.

  4. This is so scary and disturbing.
    Do we have to wait till 4 Corners or 60 Minutes picks up on it before something changes? Or do we have to wait for something worse…? I hope not.

  5. Eleanor says

    Police came to speak to our primary school about using Facebook. They spoke to the Year 3,4 and 5’s. It was alarming for my sons, they are now so anti it and I have had to explain and justify why it is ok for me to use it for work. They complained for days and gave me every bad reason not to use Facebook so that is my dilemma. I do think education at home, setting an example and supervision are so important in these matters. We cannot leave parenting to large organisations and government.

  6. Great article Nathalie. In my seminars I always have a slide that says to parents; “Knowledge is not equal to wisdom.” So although kids may be more computer savvy than some parents, they do not have the years of life experience or the developmental maturity to engage unsupervised online.

    I spoke at the National Digital Schools Conference and the issue with mobile phones is that some schools are looking at using twitter in the classroom to engage students in the lesson. This is great in theory but can be problematic in terms of how this gets monitored and how teachers would know if a child was actually engaged in the task at hand.

    A school I spoke at last year has rolled out ipads but are finding it difficult to monitor that the kids are not gaming or jumping onto facebook in class.

    There are some strong positives about facebook and every teen in my office speaks of it as part of their daily conversation. Our kids need to be cyber literate but we need to be giving them tools to deal with the risks, as well as setting strong boundaries, just as we would around a public swimming pool for example.

    I could go on all day… this is my area of passion 🙂

  7. Another great post hun!
    FB is a worrying place for so many people
    All my cousins are on there and while my 15yo cousin has never had sexual comments shes been abused so many times and i just dont understand why she dosent delete them!
    FB can be a terrible place if not used correctly
    And even at 25 the term “friends” is a joke to me some of them are empty friends
    The thing that worries me the most is the parents who make profiles for their babies! Why does a baby need a FB profile? Why is not sharing their photos on your page enough?
    I can tell you all of this can really make someone think twice about having a profile even at my age
    To alot of people its nothing but a numbers game and being someone they aren’t
    Then you have to wonder if that carries over into real life?!
    xxx

  8. Gillian Lee says

    Wow Nat! Incredibly thought provoking.
    It’s easy to forget that not everyone’s page is full of lime trees and sunny mummies!
    Definitely ontroversial but good to heighten awareness of what can/does go on in the teen’s world of facebook.
    Our children are living in a completely different world and it’s so important that we educate ourselves so we can continue to be their guides. Not easy peasy though!

  9. Why just pick on Facebook? You can read stuff like this on every social networking site and on jsut about every forum on the internet.

    The bottom line is the so-called parenting skills of the people who gave birth to these children rather than the mechanism used.

  10. My daughter wasn’t allowed Facebook until she was 13 & even then only reluctantly. I will not permit adults to be her “friends” in the hope that I can minimize her potential access to thus sort of thing without control. I monitor her friends, both who she adds & their content. I don’t want my child to see that sort of exchange, be the subject of it nor a participant. Until I feel she’s mature enough I won’t relax my vigilance. Then I’ll do it all over again when my son gets a Facebook account 🙁 It’s a two-edged sword, to be socially empowered we have to run this risk, to deny them the social interaction is to ostracize them from their peers.

  11. Nathalie, this is a brilliant post. It’s fleshed out well and leaves me with a lot to think about. My eldest is now 10, and doesn’t have a facebook account (and won’t for a while) but it’s something I’m thinking about and how to monitor it in the future. There’s some pretty scary stuff out there…and knowing about it is important when it comes to preventing it. Thank you.

  12. FanTAStic!! You can’t hear me, but I’m applauding you. And I’m so sharing this .. on … ummm… Facebook. Because I know heaps of my friends let their kids have FB accounts, and they need to read this.

  13. Excellent post, tyvm. I have found exactly what you say about Facebook with my teen children. Thank you for your response to Andrew’s post. It was easy to monitor it at first. Now both my children have “unfriended” me. Parenting skills must be met by cooperation from the community; it’s impossible to do it on your own.

  14. Fantastic post. Terrifying to think this is acceptable, or that safety of children is so unimportant in the FB world.

    Do my kids have FB accounts? Yes. But I have their logins, they are linked to my e-mail accounts and I monitor it constantly. They do not have 200 friends, only those they know irl.

    Like anything it can be abused, but only if it is not used properly and if the children are not monitored.

    My boys are 13&1/2 and just under 12 (as in birthday very soon).

    But even when older I will be monitoring, just too risky to assume all will be okay.

  15. Fantastic article and well timed. I recently had my children deactivate their facebook accounts. I did monitor them and watched what was happening and when I recently found an 18 year old apparently grooming my daughter I interfered and shut it down. Facebook like any other technology can be a great tool but when it replaces real relationships with internet connections it is a scary world.

  16. This is a BRILLIANT article! As a high school teacher I have been on and on about this for quite some time but people just don’t seem to listen. There is mounting evidence that it leads to depression in kids who have a predisposition to it http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/42298789/ns/health-mental_health/t/docs-warn-about-teens-facebook-depression/ .

    I wish more people would read this. Well done.

    Best wishes,
    Natasha.

    PS My kids don’t have facebook as they have seen real evidence from other people and from accounts that I have had to examine in my role as a head of a year level at my previous school. They have witnessed the damage that can be done and they have no desire to even get an account as a result.

  17. I’m not shocked by the content you’ve unearthed in this excellent post, but I’d be shocked that many parents aren’t aware that this is going on. And let’s remember that teens don’t need a Facebook account to be this vile. Every teen is exposed to this sort of horrifyingly sexual behavior all the time… The issue is bigger than Facebook, it really is!

    Is it Facebook’s responsibility to monitor this sort of thing? No, I don’t think so. But as a society we need to reexamine what we deem ok and what we think isn’t and make sone serious adjustments to sort it out. Our kids are the victims of a society willing to bury it’s head in the sand. Kids are growing up too quickly and we think ‘privacy’ settings are going to fix it.

    It’s not up to Facebook but sadly I don’t really know how to make the people it IS up to ( our governments) stand up to companies LIKE Facebook and sag enough is enough. Stop treating children like adults. x

  18. My 16 yo daughter and I have had lots of discussions about this. I have a facebook acc and she can use it but I have the password.. She agrees now that she would get too distracted from her work and she would also not want to make herself available to other girls “bitchy” comments about who ever.As a mature 16 yo – irrespective of anything sexual in content she can also see the down side. If she needs to know something she can always email, ring or text. Facebook is great for photos and other things but having “facebook with limitations” still enables her to enjoy them. I do not believe she is suffering in any way.
    It was a great article to get us all thinking!

    Julia

  19. With three-year-old and eight-month-old daughters, I fear where all this is heading into the future. If this is what’s happening now, what will they be faced with in another 10 years? It really frightens me.
    Really well written post, Nathalie.

  20. This article is a very good explanation of the basic problem. I am a german entrepreneur dealing professionally with the problem security on computing generally and on social networking specifically. Well to me it’s not the problem youngsters using facebook but how they use it. And I don’t blaim parents for that either because the internet and the use of a computer and their security is very tricky and complex.
    The software working in the background is taking the decision of you or the user and is calculating “very wrong” what you may search for and estimates your wishes. The nature of computers are very simple. They are following commands of the software and don’t ask why they are receiving them. Furthermore it makes a big difference what information the computer you are working from displays and spreads to the internet.
    To me it’s not a scary world – to me it needs improving the knowledge about the media and education and enhanced information to people – no matter if they are younger or older. You never know who you are dealing with on the other end of the line. To me it is firstly a computer.

  21. Kristie says

    what a great read – it makes you more aware of what really does go on on these kind of social networking sites. Children & teenagers are so easily led & this article shows how this could potentially wreck a childs/teens life or lead them to believe that this type of behaviour is acceptable. I have posted this to my FB wall in the hope that parents with young children might close their childs account or monitor it very carefully especially who they are becoming friends with.

  22. great, but disturbing post. I’ll be sharing it with friends who think it’s fine for underage kids to be on FB

  23. I felt sick to my stomach when I read your post and the dialogue that these young teenagers are having on Facebook. I have great concerns for my kids in regards to their exposure to this kind of depraved behaviour that must be occurring right under our noses! I am in a situation where I am divorced and I was not consulted by my ex-husband at any stage regarding our 3 children joining facebook. I found out by default. He allowed all three of OUR CHILDREN to join and they have been members for a few years now. My oldest is 16 and it sickens me that he may be viewing this kind of dialogue and any accompanying photos, desensitising him to what is decent
    and right in regards,in particular,to the treatment of women. My daughter is now 14, and I have recently by “accident” viewed her account as she had neglected to shut it down properly, and I did read the interactions between her and her friends. While I was somewhat relieved that her responses were ok I read one particular girl’s responses that is in her friendship group and was very concerned about the messages she was sending out to the boy she was trying to impress. I have spoken to my ex-husband and warned him that he may want to view our daughter’s fb and suggested that as he was the one that allowed her to join that he in fact should be her ‘friend’ so that he could monitor what she is writing and what she is exposed to. I am ‘friends’ with my youngest after again I found out that he has a fb account. He is turning 12 in December. While he does not meet the minimum age, I have been put in a difficult position as, yet again, I had no input from my ex-husband re him joining and found out by accident. I monitor his fb page daily and so far it is quite innocent in the dialogue between his friends and himself. He knows I’m watching and if I see anything that is innappropriate that I will ban him from fb. I will be having conversations with my two older ones over the dinner table when they are with me and hope to glean from them whether they see and read the posts you have provided. I will be interested to hear their views and what they find offensive or not offensive and try to go from there. You have opened my eyes to realising that I need to have that dialogue with my kids. Thankyou.

  24. Well written blog and one that I think many parents will not think about when it comes to facebook and they should. If we let our children use these sites we should know what an education our children could ‘possibly’ be in for as well. The internet is a scary place and I will be honest with you, the language frightens me.

  25. Vanessa King says

    Excellent post, Nathalie, I particularly like your suggestions that FB should institute immediately. My daughter is also on FB and I was one of her first friends. I made sure her aunties, father and nanna are also friends so we are all looking out for her. She knows I monitor her, I sometimes post on her wall to remind her and her friends of the fact.

  26. Concerned Parent says

    I totally agree that this is a very disturbing issue and I went away feeling sick inside at what our young children are exposed to. However; while reflecting later on the issue what is more disturbing is that your website was distributed by my childs primary school and within three clicks we were able to access the very language you are against underage children accessing on Facebook. I acknowledge the red warning at the top of the page however a child who goes to extremes to lie to access Facebook is not going to be deterred. As a parent I have taken parenting/IT precautions to restrict my young childrens access to inappropriate sites on the website – Facebook included. Your site would not have fallen in that category but it is yours that could have ultimately lead to my boys inappropriate education! It is not only Facebook that has a responsibility to monitor postings on their sites; sites like yours have a responsibility also as you are adding to the easily accessible inappropriate information on the internet. Maybe directions of where to see the postings would have been more appropriate, for those who cannot imagine, and then surfing children would have been denied access if parents had IT precautions in place………..Lets think twice about what we could do to not add to the problem also.

    • Hello, my post was on social media focusing on Facebook. Facebook say it safe, when it clearly is not.Facebook is where the kids are hanging out.
      This website and blog is on the internet. The internet is also too a vast array of material not suitable for children, but parents are more aware of this, and have filters on for blocking profanities etc..although not all parents.
      I have not been contacted by a school, saying my details are being given out.
      I did not put directions up to the postings, because these are children, with photos up and live on FB, they certainly don’t need anymore traffic to their pages.
      I certainly don’t want to add to the problem but needed to make parents aware.

      It is a difficult area and I do appreciate what you are saying and I will look at having the post password protected, but even then I have no way of veryfing who the person asking for the password is 18?

  27. Kimberley Belford says

    OMG This is horrifying however when I sit back and think about it am I really that surprised. No not really , I have heard young teens at the local shops speaking to each other or their parents and oh my lord, if I spoke to my dad like that I wouldnt be able to sit down for a week.

  28. Linda Courtney says

    Your article was an eye opener. There are way too many underage kids on facebook and sadly there’s no way to police it. Having their password and deactivating it does no good as they just reactivate by signing in. Logging in and changing it just has them getting another email and signing up with a new account. I have access to my daughters facebook and check it all the time, she’s warned about the bad side and facebook friends. Thankfully none use talk like the ones above, but if they did I would remove them.

  29. Nicola says

    I have 2 teenagers, both are on facebook – as I am myself now – and I am both their friends, as are many others of their extended family. So they know anything inappropriate may be viewed by us all! It worries me that many parents seem to find this kind of language ok and that their kids are only “joking?”

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