My Happy Place Day One

My Happy Place Day One

One way I get my Happy Thoughts working is by reminiscing and thinking about moments I’ve had with my family and friends. You know those moments where you laugh so hard that it hurts your face there is nothing more powerful than the connection of laughter and giggles. Lately I have not had that laughter, at times feel so overwhelmed with my darling mum, that in the moments I’m relaxing I cannot seem to get rid of the anxiousness and worry about what will happen if mum continues this decline.

What I’ve done is come to accept the situation and I know in my heart that I am doing OK and the best I can. I loved the post today by Naomi of Seven Cherubs “Lonely Mother”, it actually made me feel quite normal, especially after reading all the comments, that so many of us feel the same.

I love my work with  a passion, working with toddlers right up to teenagers really keeps me grounded and boy can they make me laugh, that’s a laugh with children, I want to have the laughter with friends and other mothers too. Behaviour is a complex maze of patterns, habits, thoughts and a lot to do with our childhood and upbringing and I know from changing child behaviour that adult behaviour is changeable too.

Being Happy all the time is hard to achieve, if you can accept your situation and slowly work through any changes you may want to make (you may not need to change anything) and be prepared for the odd stumble then being happy most of the time is a good place to be.

My Happy Place Memory

Now this is not a roll around on the floor laughing memory, I’m saving  those for another day. This is a memory thatmakes me smile and feel happy and content.

When my daughter was six years old, one night she turned to her dad and me and said “I love you both so much and I will always love you”. Dad being the wise one (sometimes) said to her “You really have to remember that feeling, because as you start to grow up and become a Teenager you will not feel the same way”  Little Miss 6 looked rather confused as to why she would ever stop loving us as much as she did . We then both explained that as a Teenager you want to start doing things your way and your body gets a little muddled up with what you think and what you do. Your parents do not seem as cool and as clever when you are a Teenager and you do not want to follow what mum and dad say.

Then dad said “You know what you are going to write down a Promise, we will all sign it, we will frame it and then we have your word, that you will always love us and be good”

Miss 6 thought this was absolutely hilarious, she giggled and giggled as she wrote out her promise, which had dad and me laughing too, and this was a serious matter Miss Six was declaring that she would always be good and we were her witnesses.

This is just a letter to myself. My mum and dad are going to keep this letter just to remind me how much we all love each other. When I am a teenager I don’t think I will be any trouble at all. If I am they will show me this letter and I will remember how fantastic they are and have been all my life.

 

We all laughed a lot  that evening and we still have her promise and now Miss 6 is a Miss 15 and I can say that she has not been any trouble at all. Maybe that’s the answer to Teen behaviour get them to write a promise when they are little 😉

 

Now I’m looking forward to reading your Happy Thoughts, you can Link up your blog below, or leave your Happy Thoughts  in the comments section. There are approximately sixty of us trying to be happier and Thanks for making me Happy and not lonely on my Happy Challenge. Love Nathalie x

 

This is the divine Twitchy’s Smiling Dog mentioned in the comments

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Nathalie Brown

Child Behaviour Consultant at Easy Peasy Kids
Child Behaviourist and researcher. Creator of "Less tantrums. More smiles". I look at the bigger picture and think outside the box when working with children and their behaviour. Their world is different. As adults we sometimes forget this. Happiness Creator in my spare time. Eater of chocolate and cake.

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Comments

  1. I love this story !!! it is heart warming , I grew up sailing and had a fabulous forehand who was 7 years old and I was 12 , we were a good team , recently we got in touch via facebook , she was telling me one of her fondest childhood memories was sailing with me , we did have a lot of fun , she vividly recalled how calmly we rode out rough weather singing at the top of our lungs, laughing, as we battled the elements , I had to confess to her I always laugh when I am scared and the singing was to calm my nerves !!! we both laughed again together , missing my friends 🙁

    • Wendy I miss my friends too they are back in the UK but I’m postive we will be forming some friendships on here. Big big hugs xx

  2. Natalie Villa says

    I really loved your story. It reminds me a lot of my daughter, it’s her 13th birthday today, and that makes me extremely happy! We are blessed to have her as she almost died when she was two weeks old. Today, she said “Mummy, I love you all the much!” When I questioned her about “all the much” she said ” well, when someone says I love you, usually you reply I love you too, but I don’t love you too, I love you all!” Then I realized that she thought people were saying “two” not “too!” I had to laugh… So sweet and innocent!

  3. Today I had a happy moment by ringing my little sister (who is far away from me at present sob, sob) to leave silly messages on her answering machine. One of them was a song that I was singing to her that ended in uncontrollable giggling, it was such bad singing! She called back when I was out and left a message saying that I had made her day. She was still sniggering from my song! Classic sister moment and that made me smile too 🙂

  4. Excellent, I should be able to get a promise out of Mr 4 soon…
    In the meantime, he amuses me with his ad-lib storytelling, like this morning when he was explaining that his Lego man had to catch the bus because his leg was sore.
    “How did it get sore?” I asked
    He thinks.
    “A truck ran over it.”
    I had to work hard to stop the giggles.
    “Hmmm. Yes. That would make his leg sore.”

  5. Katrina Crews says

    My Happy Place Memory… walking on the river front with Mr 4, and having our special conversation which usually starts with me asking “What are you?”, Mr 4 replies “Magic!”, “Why are you Magic?” I ask…. and he replies “Because I always make you smile”

    What 4 year old doesn’t want magical powers that have the ability to make people around them just smile 🙂

  6. Lauren says

    My happy place moment: I spent some time today jumping on our trampoline with my Mr 5 and Mr 3. They are always trying to get me to join them and do silly things. We were also watching my Mr 8mths while he was jumping away in the jolly jumper off our clothesline. The sun was shining and it was lovely. Mr 5 says to me “Mummy the grey clouds are going away and now there are white clouds…that’s magic Mum”. It definitely made me smile.

    • Lauren that’s awesome, jumping on the trampoline, I do it too every now and then 🙂
      How simple the moment was when you son said ‘That’s magic” So precious xx

  7. I was so happy (and immensely proud) yesterday when I witnessed, for me, the cutest moment I have ever seen. We were at the Kinder Working Bee and there was a two year old boy bawling his eyes out. His mother was just leaving him to it. My two year old boy looked at me and said ‘cuddle?’ and I nodded. So over he went, and gave him a cuddle. The two of them stood there for a few minutes, the little boy sobbing away with his head resting on my son’s shoulder. Gorgeous! May me so happy my little guy is so kind and loving.

  8. Claire says

    My 2 year old daughter who loves singing at the moment. She remembered some of the Puff the Magic Dragon song yesterday and was singing it over and over again so pleased with herself and then her Dad sang it to her at bedtime. Made me smile 🙂 x

    • Puff the Magic Dragon lived by the sea and I bet she sounds absolutely cute and adorable when she sings it and love dad singing too. xx

  9. One of my happy place memories is with my Miss 6. On several occasions, when the kids have been talking about what they want to be when they grow up, Miss 6 has said that she wants to be ‘a mum, just like you mummy.’ (My eldest wants to be a scientist, and my son wants to be a fireman). It’s even more special, because she is a strong-willed child and we have had our battles – it makes me smile because I must be doing something right.

  10. That’s – simply – beautiful. What a wise dad. xx

  11. Have tried to link my blog – but I am a real newbie at blogging, so hopefully it works. Sooz. PS – Loving all the great happy moments!

  12. Catherine says

    My happy place today is laughing at my son, Mr “nearly 3 mummy” who has a new phrase – “what are you doin’ mummy?”. I hear it at least 20 times a day and usually as I’m fulfilling a request from him! For example changing his nappy his little voice asks “what are you doin’ mummy?”. Today I answered “I’m eating an elephant”, Mr 2 roared laughing “no you’re not mummy!” I’ll have to think of something else tomorrow.

    • Perfect 🙂 You really can just make stuff up on the spot and they will delight you with their giggles. The silly, the crazy and the funny – Keep them laughing and you will always smile xx

    • Catherine – this is my favourite phrase from my 2yo. It comes out as “ahyou doin mummy” and it is just so sweet. He always listens carefully to our response, repeats it back to himself and then gets a very thoughtful and satisfied look on his face!

  13. My happy place today is remembering the amazing contentment I used to feel holding my tiny baby boy who is now four. I can still find that feeling when I close my eyes and float away to that precious time.

    Nat, I am SO getting a letter from my little ones. I was a devilish teenager. Karma is gonna be a bitch! Maybe a reminder for all of us might be a helper for what could be the rough times of teenagers.

    • I too when cuddling Mr 6 & Miss 15 can close my eyes and picture them as babies and the lovely baby smell just after they’ve had baths. Great Happy moments.
      The Promise letter has worked a treat here xx

  14. My happy place today comes in 2 the first was Lil C (1yo) being cheeky & touching my iphone & ipad, every time i busted him i’d just stop & give him a look 😉 he would then stop look at me slowly raise his hand to the side of his head & go “oooooo” way too cute to stay serious lol
    The 2nd was Master J running out of bed & out the front door when he heard me get home from work the look on his face was amazing he was so happy to see me

    Cant wait to see what tomorrow brings
    Xxx

    • Tara that has made me 🙂 Mr 1 sounds too cute and I love it when I come home and the cuddles and smiles I get from my kids-definately a happy moment xx

  15. Hi. Not sure where we are supposed to write our Happy Thoughts but as it is getting close to my bed time I thought I would just put my thought for the day here.

    I had the opportunity today to attend a workshop on developing personal resiliency. It made me incredibly happy to have this opportunity as this is something that I am working hard on in my life at the moment. I also felt happy to realise that I do actually have a lot of skills in resiliency and feel inspired that I will make it through the hard time I am presently having and come out of it stronger and happier.

    • Kerry yes just underneath the posts is fine 🙂 So please that you enjoyed your workshop and yes sometimes we donot realise how much we can actually do something till we try. I hope you are feeling stronger day by day and happier too xx

  16. I think my happy thought for today would be the realisation of how many happy moments there are in a day when you are actually looking out for them.

    For what was just a ‘normal’ day, there were plenty of things to be happy about:
    * Mr 5 being excited about going back to school that he woke early and dressed himself before breakfast – two battles we often fight over avoided 😉
    * The pleasure Miss 2 had in looking for snails in the backyard today and the excitement when she found daddy snail, baby snail and finally mummy snail – actually they weren’t snails, they were millipedes, but she was happy calling them snails.
    * As a family we sang some songs hubby and I knew from childhood which were in a new book Mr 5 has received – probably hyped the kids up a bit before bed, but we all had fun.

    Just looking out for the happy moments, has made the ‘not so happy’ moments easier to deal with.
    Bring on the next 29 days!

    • Katrina that is what happy moments are about, in life with so much going on, we can pass and miss those moments of happiness. So pleased that they have helped. xx

  17. Jo Thomson says

    My Happy Place was my 2 1/2 year old daughter. She really loves cuddles and I’m still smiling about our trip to town last week. She was walking up to random strangers and giving them a cuddle. It reminded me a bit of the video clip for ‘All The Same’ by Sick Puppies… The free hugs campaign.

  18. I’ve been all over the interwebz today so I’m going to leave my first entry right here. I wish I could leave a photo too 🙁

    The smile on my dog makes me so very happy. I know that’s not meant to be real but I don’t really care – I truly believe my dog smiles.

    I made her smile on Friday night, and that made me smile right back. My doggy girl is 16 in February, has had half her teeth removed, has problems eating, digesting and with her collapsing back legs due to weakened hips.

    Friday nights we have family movie nights with takeaway food and treats. She used to love being tossed a cracker or corn chip, but now she’s too afraid to eat them, even popcorn.

    Last Friday night we got Chinese takeaway and scored a huge bag of prawn crackers. I tossed one her way but she was too scared to try it. I urged her on and she picked it up gingerly in her mouth. I swear I saw the delight on her doggy face when it dissolved so easily and tasted so good! She had a few more and it made her happy. Which made me happy. Our time together now is limited, so these moments really count. 🙂

    • If you want to email me the photo I can try and add it in gorgeous. I believe my dog smiles too, he has missing teeth and Mr 6 calls him a pirate. A dog is part of the family and I’m happy he was able to suck on a prawn cracker, bet he was grining from ear to ear.xx

  19. I love this Nat! I will remember this for when Master 2 is a bit older!

  20. Chelsea says

    Tonight I laid on couch and mr four laid on me. We hugged quitely. Then we played then we hugged (all up it probably lasted for five mintues before we were disturbed) I can’t remember the last time we did that. Since his little sister came along (17mths) all we ever seem to do is fight.
    It must of meant something to him to as before bed he asked if we could lie on the couch tomorrow during his sisters sleep!

    • Hi Chelsea Mr 4 is pobably a little out of place since his sister arrived and you spending that cuddle time with him is just perfect. xx

  21. Whenever you mention your mum….it makes me remember my Nan and her Alzheimer’s and all the funny little quirks it had to begin with……she lived with us when I was a teenager and I remember I used to love listening to all her stories about her childhood street parties and friends, as she talked about that alot at that stage I heard quite a bit of this! I remember to cheer her up I used to grab her and do this kind of mad salsa up and down the house with her !It would have us in fits of laughter! I also to used to love drawing portraits of her and her dreaded maltease “Carla” while she was daydreaming. That dog was mad! It could bite through ugg boots and draw blood!

    • My mum can cheer up immediately when I play Spanish music and dance around, those are her happy moments. That dog sounds mad xx

  22. What a lovely story – thanks for sharing 🙂
    My happy place today was finishing work early (worked out the house today at my ‘Star’ cafe) and despite the pouring rain (our first this Autumn), decided to go get my children from play school.
    My daughter’s eyes lit up when she saw me. She (5,5) asked: “Have you finished your work Mom?” Yes, love. “And now we can go home and play together?”
    Yes!
    It was a wonderful feeling and I felt very privileged to be able to do this occasionally 🙂
    It’s early evening here, so I’m sure there’s more to come 🙂

    • Sylva it’s all those occassional moments that simply add up and make us happy. Children love spending time with us and Those are the moments they remeber too. XX

  23. caroline says

    I too need to find my happy place so thank you Nathalie for the inspiration and the opportunity to devote some “me” time into my day to re-evaluate.My happy place today was playing the piano with Miss 6 snuggled on my knee whilst her brother was out at scouts. The giggling and silly tunes and songs we made up were an icebreaker for a mother and daughter who are playing a battle of wills right now .

    • The time you spent with Miss 6 today will benefit her sooooo much. If you can do something that makes her giggle everyday, you will both have Happy moments a great way of changing behaviour. xx

  24. My day started off well and continued to be great until early afternoon (when all turned ugly). Miss 2 was in fine form, waking me up dressed dressed in a pink tutu and an over-sized sombrero. Who couldn’t smile at that vision? She loves dressing up so was keen to keep her outfit on for Playgroup. I convinced her to ditch the hat (as it wouldn’t fit in the car!) and she was happy with that. On arriving at Playgroup, she noticed witches hats and traffic lights had been put out to play with. She ran to a witches hat, promptly stuck it on her head, then spent the session singing “the witches at the witches ball” at full volume while dancing around the yard. She had everyone smiling 🙂

    • I’m happy you managed to see the happy moments in your day, Miss 2 sounds hilarious in her tutu and sombrero. Miss 2 had the power to make everyone smil and that is simply beautiful .xx

  25. Today a friend recommended I check out Amy Sedaris’ book Crafts for Poor People…Just thumbing thru it I laughed out loud at her photos and humor.

  26. Pauline says

    Sorry I missed Day One. We are having a torrid time with Miss 3.5 at the moment, well I am! But regularly during the day, she will come up to me, give me a cuddle and whisper “I love you”. Even during the worst of times, you can’t help but smile at that…it warms my heart and makes me realise I must be doing something right amidst all the yelling and screaming!

  27. Rachelle says

    Missed seeing this yesterday but my happy moment was having a child free breakfast & being able to have a great conversation with hubby. Then going to pick up the kids & see their faces light up when they saw us. Simple but important to us=P

    • That is a fab happy moment, time with your partner is so very important and then the happiness is seslade when you see your happy kids. xx

  28. I missed yesterday too, but my happy moment was when both my teenage girls came in my room and were hanging out with me while I did my work and they did their homework. This is a rare thing since we are all so busy and on hectic schedules and when they are home, they are both usually behind their closed doors. There didn’t need to be a lot of conversation, just all of us being together made me happy.

  29. im so sorry im behind eeeepppp

    my happy place for day one was listening to my children play normally i listen or just watch {for reasons i dont understand} this time my youngest yells out mumma come wrestle me so with all 4 of my children jumping on the trampoline i ran over and started tripping them up {even the 10 and 12 yr olds !!} and much to my delight my hubby got involved too we laughed so hard our bellys hurt we have been so caught up in “being busy” we forgot that simple things are so much more important <3

    • Kimmy that is exactly what being happy in the moment is. These are moments that you and your children will always remember. xx

  30. Apologies for being late also.
    My happy place today was simply with the kids … my 4month old on my lap, and my 3 year old who asked to join us. She climbed onto the other knee and promptly put her arm round her wee sister while I cuddled them both. Simple, yet so, so sweet

  31. Natalie Villa says

    Morning all, after a late night out with the family, I have to say my Happy Place this morning is my bed! I slept in, the kids slept in and Hubby well, he never sleeps in, he went and bought the paper and fresh croissants for breakfast.
    All this sounds nice, but my favorite part, the moment that made my heart sing, was when my 13 year old daughter, and 14 year old son both jumped into my bed. We chatted about our night out and about the yummy food. To finish my perfect morning, hubby brought me tea in bed, is today Mothers’ Day?
    It sure feels like it. 🙂

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