This post is not about what I learnt from attending the awesome sessions at Problogger as I only attended the initial and ending speakers keynote and a lounge session on monetization. Picking up the general gist through Twitter and from speaking to attendees and friends. One word keeps coming up ‘dream’. Dream is a beautiful word it encompasses something we want with a fiery passion. The dreams I have scare me. They give me butterflies. They can and do exhaust me. It is my dream yet at times my nightmare.
Dedication kicks in through the frustrations, the misunderstandings, some crying and a some chocolate cake. A big fat zero of nothing will happen if you are not dedicated to your dream. Your dream needs action to turn it into reality. There are no shortcuts. There will be rejection, criticism, days possibly weeks where you feel you take one step forward and two steps back. Our dreams can knock the confidence out of us when we face areas that we have no or little knowledge about as to make our dream real we realise we have to navigate through a mine field of things we never contemplated we needed to do.
Whatever your reasons were to attend Problogger and all of our reasons although very varied are centralised around blogging. Blogging whether it be personal blog or a business blog or a bit or both involves writing. Writing to connect.
Reality is your every day situation. It means being realistic of what you feel dedicated enough to accomplish on a daily basis. For new bloggers the reality is that you will not be able to monetize your blog in the first month. The reality is that your readers will not want to see a whole lot of sponsored posts if you have not connected with them initially through your writing. Reality is tough it is not fluffy and sweet. Your writing is your reality, your readers are your reality, connecting with your words comes first, not your SEO, not how awesome your blog/website looks, not how much you spent on advertising or promotions but your words and your writing. Your readers are looking for a connection, they looking for reality, give them that first above anything else.
Expectations within a personal dream are high. You are setting the bar you want to reach. With expectations allow yourself room to fall. It’s ok to fall and reset your expectations or start climbing back up. Expectations are personal. Give yourself the permission to have not so good days, celebrate the winning moments no matter how small. What you expect from others will not necessarily line up with what you receive in return. Your readers expect honesty, solutions, laughs and an understanding that they are not alone. Comparisons are futile and can be demoralising, trying to work out why someone else’s blog is so successful means you are comparing. Find and use your own voice in your blogging. Their success in blogging means they have connected with their readers.
Acceptance is not always favourable. Acceptance of any given situation does not necessarily mean it is a great situation to be in but acceptance that it is happening, perhaps beyond your control and being aware of how you act and not immediately react may give you the time to piece together the bigger picture. Understanding that not everyone will agree with you, or even understand your dream or blog is not always a personal attack. Our dreams are purely ours, we can share them through blogging but they won’t be everyone’s cup of tea.
Mistakes my personal learning curve is so full of mistakes that even thinking about them make me cringe. I have to step back frequently and see what the lesson was. At times the lesson is not clearly apparent sometimes with time it unravels with a definite I was totally wrong or with a I could have done better there. Admitting you’ve made mistakes keeps you real. Mistakes are a continuous part of learning. Mistakes are part of the nightmare. Nightmares show us we are real, fallible and not perfect. Our dreams our perfect in our heads, in reality there will be mistakes.
A dream takes time, blogging can help you fulfill your dream; keep writing, connecting and learning. Take time to reassess where you are at. What direction is your dream taking? Do you need to change the path? Be kind to yourself , it is ok to feel scared, your comfort zone will be stretched, take all the time you need.
My personal dream is happening, I make mistakes and apologise. As my dream evolves I have been pulled and advised in many directions. I’ve slipped up in the last few months, got lost in all that is going on, struggling to keep up, my dream has gained momentum and I am actively slowing it down. Re-focusing on my clients and the children I work with as they are the most important part of my dream. Dedicating this website and blog back to child behaviour the bigger picture. Any other blogging or writing I do like my posts on social media, my life and my thoughts will be some where else as a guest post. So let me know if you would like a guest post from me in the future (no deadlines please)
Keep following your dreams but don’t get too lost in them. Small steps and the occasional backward step are all part of real dreams actualising.
Nathalie Brown
Perfect advice. I always like to think a dream is not a goal, it is a lifestyle. You can live your dream, it just takes hard work, dedication and a little luck. Keep striving, keep living, keep dreaming. 🙂
Thanks lovely. Keep living I like that a lot x
I’m loving experiencing the Problogger conference via the blogs. It’s awesome and thank you for such a great post, Nathalie.
“Living the dream” is what it’s all about. The living, not necessarily the striving. Working out how we can make our everyday as good as what we think our goal will be is the key, I reckon. x
I can’t wait to listen to the virtual pass 🙂 It’s amazing how all the event posts have a variety of lessons learnt. Living it daily and reining yourself in when it starts to consume you like you say daily working out our goal to the best of our ability is so important. As our ability can change due to circumstances everyday. xx
Would love to have you guest post for me, Nathalie. Any time…
We have a deal then x
This post has helped me focus even further. Thanks for being a great ‘happiness creator’ x
You are a sweetheart and lot more lovely things, Focus is my key at the moment. xx
Interesting and informative, thanks! 🙂
Thanks for reading, just trying to give a reality of the dream 🙂
And what’s exciting for me is that I get to be part of you slowing your dream down and re-focusing. I am looking at new home page designs for you as I speak 🙂
You have no idea how happy I am that I have you on my side. I owe you BIG time for not just the website but for you being so wonderful,honest, kind and so very patient with me xx
What an inspiring post Nathalie. You should have been speaker at PB! Next year I hope to see you up there!
Thanks Penny. I’m ok at speaking events with children. Adults I’m not so sure of 😉
Lots of gems in this post. I particularly like what you say about acceptance. I think the impact of acceptance is huge. It reminds me of the expression, “what you resist, persists.” My mum used to say this to me, as a nice way of saying “stop torturing yourself with what ifs, and accept the situation and move on”. Great post Nathalie and I would love it if you could guest post for Not another slippery dip one day!
Wise lady your mum. It is so difficult to do. Impossible to accept everything all the time, but I’m getting there. You are on the list for a guest post. Thanks you x
It was great to catch up with you nat and hear all your amazing news. Love this post as well xx
Deb lovely seeing you too, glad we managed to chat on the first night, thank you for sharing your story too. x
“Keep following your dreams but don’t get too lost in them. Small steps and the occasional backwards step are all part of real dreams actualising”
I really needed to hear that (read that)! Thanks for the advice Nathalie.
It was lovely meeting you, hope all goes as well as possible for you with your new dream x
Love this – just working on my blog which I’m launching mid-November to coincide with my first book coming out. This was the perfect time for me to come accross your post – just what I needed to read to help stave off the doubts and keep on keeping on.. Thanks for helping me pursue the dream !
Jo
Pleasure good luck with the blog and book Nx
You summed the concept of ‘a dream’ beautifully. Thank you for the inspiration.