Stress and anxiety
GAS is my abbreviation of guilt, anxiety and stress. Just writing about GAS makes me feel slightly guilty, stressed and anxious. I hear mothers everyday through work, at school and on Twitter, Facebook and their Blogs say these words everyday.
“I feel guilty that I haven’t spent enough time with my kids”
“When I get up in the morning I feel anxious about the day a head”
“Stress is really affecting my life, I can’t seem to have fun anymore”
Stress and anxiety are detrimental
In real terms the word gas is energy, in this term GAS (guilt, aniety and stress) zaps away your energy.
Now of course I don’t know all your actual personal situations but I can draw on the experience I have of working with mothers and my own experience of how I deal with GAS. Yes I fully understand we all have different issues in our lives and what works for one person may not work for another. I do know that if you suffer from GAS it actually produces more GAS and you end up feeling worse.
Do not let others give you GAS, does it really matter that much what others think? They do not live your life or even know much about what you do or who you are . Never let someone’s judgements be a reflection on you, its a reflecion of themselves. They obviously have a lot of GAS.
What’s different now is that I’ve learnt not to let it control my life, if I’m full of GAS my behaviour is erratic, and my emotions are on a rollercoaster. We know how our behaviour affects our children and those around us. GAS makes you feel more GAS and makes you feel down.
I have days, as we all do, where my GAS can be all consuming, the difference now is that I can feel I have it and I stop, gather my thoughts and take a moment to appreciate the bigger picture. So what if my house is messy, I’d rather drop the messy house guilt and work on the I do not spend enough time with my family guilt instead of cleaning. My love for my family supercedes my love of cleaning. I lose the GAS I have by spending time with them, and being with them seems to put a lot of the small stuff into persepective. The perspective being is does not really matter.
As women with have an inbuilt sensory radar we seem to comprehend and pick up what other people want and need, that’s brilliant. Unfortunately not many other people can pick up on what you need. So you have to tell them.
Stress and anxiety how I deal with it
I’ve learnt how to communicate and talk about what I want. I’ve realised that no matter what my actions say, no one can read my mind.
I’ve learnt not to listen to criticism or what other people think about me. Unless its constructive.
I’ve learnt to STOP every now & then and take 10 minutes to myself, even if its in the bathroom or car or a cafe.
I’ve learnt to not carry GAS about yesterday or tomorrow. Yesterday has passed and tomorrow is not even here.
I’ve learnt that singing in the car at the top of my voice- makes me feel good.
I’ve learnt that many mothers have GAS and I want to help them get rid of their GAS, because it’s not good to live like that. Motherhood shouldn’t be full of GAS.
I’ve learnt there is no fool proof way to parenting. What works for someone may not work for another.
I’ve learnt that when I feel GAS I can control it.
I’ve learnt to Breathe and really not sweat the small stuff. You can turn a fair bit of big stuff into small stuff and feel the GAS subside.
I’ve learnt that smiling with strangers makes them smile.
I’ve learnt that getting rid of my GAS starts with me.
I’ve learnt that mothers need support and friendship to get rid of their GAS.
I’ve learnt that too much GAS gives our children GAS.
Today try and let your GAS not control you.
Connect with your kids at breakfast, or in the car on the way to school.
Connect with yourself and decide on a plan that will help ease your GAS.
The same way regular gas makes us feel bloated and yucky , so does guilts, stress and anxiety.
Drop the word guilt from your vocabulary and watch the anxiouness and stress subside.
Great reminder and tips. I sometimes feel guilty for not feeling guilty (if that makes sense!).
Fantastic Post…we all have to pull ourselves from time to time..and listen to our inner selves..most of the time one finds an answer…and should follow his or her instinct.
I can totally relate to that. I have awful feelings of mother guilt constantly that I don’t spend enough time with my kids, which is made worse by the fact that I work from home. While I am so grateful to be here all the time with them (they are 9 and 5), take them to school, we able to shuffle work times for school things, etc, I do feel horrible with things like holidays and I am sitting here working all day. I allow myself to dispel all of this, however, by reminding myself it is for the good of my kids that I work from home so that I am here more, they don’t have to go into care, etc.
Fabulous Post! I was nodding and agreeing with a lot of your points.
I suffer from PND and Anxiety. I am currently already doing some of the things you have suggested, but am defianlty going to take a lot of what you have said on board!
Thanks
GAS. I think it is what my issue is. And im going to work on it. I think i shall need to read what you have learnt daily, to keep me on track and show me it can be done. I am strong and i can do it. And to acheive the best for my son an my family life, i need to work on my GAS before it errodes into life permenantly.
And thanks for your blog. I read all the new entries and try to participate in your fb comments 🙂 I find you an inspiration to what i want to be as a mum 🙂 Thank you for all your insights in all the different topics you cover 🙂
Oh THANK YOU for this life lesson! I am constantly struggling with GAS, but now I have some ideas with how to deal with it and happy mum = happy kids!
Thankyou for your post. I have struggled with anxiety for many years & had added stress & a world of guilt because I had to continue taking medication whilst I was pregnant.
Your words of strenght & wisdom made me smile. It was a gentle reminder that I am not alone.
Thankyou
great post, and the tips are fantastic.. GAS love it!
Awesome post, I really hope this helps all the mums with ‘GAS’ out there!